The Truth About Resilience: It’s Not What You Think

Over the past few years, there have been many times when I’ve had to dig deeper than ever before to find resilience. When life feels overwhelming or unjust, it’s tempting to put your head down, feel defeated, and say, 'This is impossible.' But life is too precious for us to be defined by external pressures.

When challenges arise, we have two choices: we can let them crush us, or we can stand tall, learn, and adapt and become stronger, wiser, and more remarkable for the experience.

Resilience is often discussed as if it’s something rare, but it isn’t. It’s a life-changing quality that everyone can cultivate. Resilience is the ability to bounce back, to face challenges head-on, and to stay open to change — even when the path forward is anything but smooth.

In today's world, resilience is not optional; it's essential. We live in a fast-paced, highly connected society where social media inundates us with information, opinions, and judgments; it often feels as though we live in an era when only outrage sells. Even when criticism isn't directed at us, it can still affect our emotional well-being.

True resilience isn’t about becoming immune to stress; none of us can claim that. It’s about training our minds and bodies to respond differently. It’s about growing stronger, not harder. And it’s about believing that, whatever happens, “Tomorrow will be a Good Day™ - Captain Sir Tom Moore

If you want to build lasting resilience, there are three key areas to focus on:

1. Perseverance 
Sometimes, walking back into a difficult situation feels counterintuitive. But true resilience demands that we face fear rather than flee from it. It requires us to tap into our inner grit, challenge old mindsets, and shift our perspective. When you view obstacles from a new angle, they often become stepping stones instead of stumbling blocks.

2. Optimism 
There will always be people who view the glass as half empty. Don’t be one of them. When you’re building resilience, understand that every hurdle is temporary. Good or bad, nothing lasts forever. Hold onto the certainty that you will make it through.

3. Self-Reflection 
The most resilient people are not the ones who never struggle; they are the ones who understand themselves deeply. Self-reflection helps you recognise your triggers, your emotional responses, and your inner strengths. By knowing yourself better, you equip yourself to handle future storms with wisdom and grace.

Resilience isn't built overnight. When you're in the midst of a difficult moment, your brain naturally defaults to fight-or-flight mode. That’s normal. The work of resilience comes afterwards.

After the storm passes, take time to reflect: 
- What worked? 
- What didn’t? 
- What could I do differently next time? 

Push yourself to face new challenges, even when they scare you. Analyse setbacks honestly. Forgive yourself for mistakes. Most importantly, speak to yourself with kindness, not criticism.

No one builds resilience alone. A strong support system can make all the difference. Talk to people you trust — friends, family members, colleagues, or a mentor. Share your story. Listen to theirs. When we connect through vulnerability, we realise we're never truly alone.

If you would like personal support in building your resilience, adapting to change, or preparing for your next chapter, I offer accredited coaching designed to help you Be Moore Remarkable. Together, we’ll work on developing your strength, strategy, and spirit, so that whatever life brings, you can meet it with confidence and courage.

You deserve to believe that “Tomorrow will be a Good Day™ — and I can help you make it one.